I Love Memories


Dearest Sister of my Heart,

I miss you.  

I realized the other day that I have no idea what your life is like these days.  I assume you are busy, but don’t know with what.  I like to imagine you sitting at a table with a pen and paper, writing or drawing pages to be bound into a book, with the sunlight filtering in and shining off your glasses …Aaand then I realize we are not nine anymore.  But when I think of you, that is how I see you… not nine, but writing, working, creating.  Always creating. 

Some of the clearest memories I have are with you.  I remember clear as day the peace and joy of coloring on that enormous-feeling rock on the canoe trip when we were four and five.  I remember your basement in Erie and hours of fun spent down there.  I remember days spent across the street from Grandma and Patoo’s at the Lines School park, lurking around the building playing spies, and the puppet theatre we made at your house that christmas that my dad gave me all the animal puppets.

I have begun to write out a number of my specific memories of my dad from my childhood (you are in many of them).  He was the one to weave magic into my vision of the world and I don’t want to forget any of that or lose that vision with age, especially as my kids come into that impressionable age of imagination.  I think, the reason I felt led to do it is because of the last few visits to the “homeland.”  Watching John specifically, spending time with my dad and playing many of those same imaginative games that I did in my childhood with him.  Not to mention, childhood is just such good material!  It’s life at it’s rawest.  The simplest and and most exaggerated view of the world.  That’s what makes it so precious and, I think, why children can see some things that adults have lost the eyes for.  

I wonder what my kids will write about me someday… *yeesh*

Which reminds me… Evie’s newest word: “booya”.  Yup, the boys next door taught her and John thinks it’s the bomb.  If you aren’t up on the current slang, it’s a term that is rather self-congratulating, describes excitement, lets others know the magnificence of the celebration as well as the superiority of the user, and is used as an exclamation of those ideas… basically it’s an updated version of “nee-ner-nee-ner-neeeee-ner” (which, lets face it, never goes out of style).  Yes, my dear sweet little girl is “in-your-face”-ing it to the boys when they prompt her.  *sigh*  I have to admit it is sort of funny… and LUCKILY she has no clue what it means yet.  Gloating is a more complex idea, though I am sure with an older brother to spur her on she will pick it up soon enough.  

Ok, time to be about the business (or busy-ness) of the day.  Thanks for the few minutes of peace and presence with me.  I love you.

Your Cuz,

The Epistolarian

P.S. – What do you want  your kids write about you someday?


4 responses »

  1. I just partially completed a family “history in pictures” book that has opened the floodgates of memories I have of my sisters. I have five of them, with me as #2. The oldest, and my closest, died of breast cancer 18 years ago and that’s left a huge void in my life. The only two pictures taken professionally of us as children were separated by my mom cutting them apart. I got the “Diane” side and Jackie the “Jackie side.” We were inseparable and complementary growing up, even through very different personalities. Ironically, there is a heart-shaped void when I scanned those two pictures for the album. She is always and forever in my heart.

    Are you one of three true sisters? Or were the others cousins? Doesn’t matter, really. Gathering pictures has re-opened a relationship and reunited myself and a cousin I never got to know very well growing up. I’m now growing to love her and sharing many memories, both the good and not so good, as we share mementos from our Grandmother, whom we called “Grandma on the Farm.” I was a city girl, she a farm-girl; I with 5 sisters, she an only child. But we both played accordions and both became Medical Technologists ~ and just recently both shared the joy and spiritual bonding of worshiping our LORD at a Hillsong United Worship Service/ Concert. Her mom, my only remaining Aunt, will be 100 years old on Feb. 23…. and she’s letting me borrow her accordion…. and we’ll share many other things and memories. For all eternity, thanks to our precious Savior, Jesus the Christ, Son of the Living God.

    Much love to you,

    • That’s so special. I have no blood sisters. The sister of my heart is my cousin Sarah who is one year my junior but we grew up kindred spirits. I am an only child so my cousins were always very important to me and the closest thing that I had to siblings…

  2. This memory is almost tangible, and it’s not even mine! Nicely done. 🙂
    I wanted to say that I want my children to remember my good and forget my bad. But then I thought, maybe they need to remember my mistakes so they can have grace for their own. and then I thought I don’t know if I am strong enough and humble enough to pray that for my children.
    See this crazy rabbit trail you started for me? 😉

    • What a poingant struggle that is. How do we have the courage to trust our children to God’s good protection and wisdom as opposed to our own which tends toward controlling and yet still take on the hands-on job of ushering them into their wide open spaces. I know (and remember from childhood) the good and the bad of my parents and appreciate the role that BOTH have had in helping me to choose my steps, my path. Thanks for stopping by and the thought-provoking comment, Stacie!

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